The price of a soul is tremendously over estimated
Really over rated
I should know
I have tried to sell mine on a number of occasions
The rumor that Satan wants every soul just isn’t so.
First I tried to trade for a little talent, then a gift of calculating mental agility
I would have settled for some athletic ability
A couple of winning lottery tickets would have been great
What if I could think up some truly great invention
Anything to rescue me from my dull, humdrum ordinary fate
There are Senators and Congressmen who appear to have no problem
With the sale of their soul, some of them have sold the same soul several times
But no, not me, not one offer, not even for a single solitary dime
And those attorneys that represented OJ
I don’t have to tell you that the deal they worked out was more than just OK
The government employees, you know, the bureaucrats
They don’t even have to make a deal with the devil
Satan just comes by collects what he wants and drops off mountains of benefits,
tons of vacation pay, sick leave and even a couple sacks of workman’s comp
God, I’m jealous, all I ask is a playing field that’s level
I have come to understand that no one wants to buy my soul
Because it requires to much care, feeding and attention
At this point in my life I was beginning to think, ok, if I can not sell it
Maybe, just maybe, I could lease it out in exchange for something I could keep
But alas here lately I find that the best I can do it rent it out real cheap
Last week I was able to hook up an illegal television cable
I’ll be saving $29.95 a month on an ongoing basis for just a tiny piece
Of my soul, which I will barely miss
And I discovered when dining out at some fancy feast
Your friends and relatives will always pay if you don’t actively resist
You can hire and illegal alien to do yard work
Cheaper than the kid next door, I wonder why
I am nice to everyone even if they are a jerk
Because someday, somehow I might get something that belongs to them
And the thought of something free makes me so happy I could cry
But do you know what, no matter how far I reduced the price of my soul
It was never quite as low as what some other fool was willing go
I think the fair market price of a soul would be higher
If we would all agree to hold out for a really great deal,
and somehow turn the tables on the buyer