The Duffer’s Lament

I hit it in the thicket and then into the water

I hit it by the clubhouse and almost hit my daughter

I hit it with my iron and hit it with my wood

I hit it directly at where the flagpole stood

I hit it at sun up and again at the sunset

I hit it for fun and just to win a bet

I hit it in the winter and I have hit it in the spring

I hit it in the summer and hit it on the green

I hit it on the way, just before my wedding

I hit it in my dreams underneath the bedding

I hit it into the sand

I hit it out again

I hit it up, down, over, out, and under

I hit it in the sunshine and underneath the thunder

I hit it off the tee and hit it right against the tree

I hit it almost everywhere, even by the sea

I hit it in the desert and hit it by the lake

I hit it in the bunker and nearly killed a snake

I hit it in miniature and for the number nine

I hit it over hills and bounced it off a pine

I hit it just off the course, over by the well

I hit it at at an eagle but it landed down in hell

I hit it near and I have hit it awfully far

But doggone it, I’ve never, never, hit it under par